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week three ❧ saturday
[It doesn't feel real.
It really, really doesn't feel real. But Nino can't stay only with Jaffar. She'll spend the majority of her night with him, naturally, but there are other people she wants to see, other people she wants to speak with--
At least.
That's her intention.
But she can't seem to manage to bring herself to get there--instead, she ends up collapsed in the sand, fingers buried in the grains, and head bowed as she cries.
This is it, after everything--and she doesn't want to die.]
It really, really doesn't feel real. But Nino can't stay only with Jaffar. She'll spend the majority of her night with him, naturally, but there are other people she wants to see, other people she wants to speak with--
At least.
That's her intention.
But she can't seem to manage to bring herself to get there--instead, she ends up collapsed in the sand, fingers buried in the grains, and head bowed as she cries.
This is it, after everything--and she doesn't want to die.]
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[she crouches down to Nino's level, looping her arms around her knees]
Are you scared?
[she's still bad at comforting. despite how many times she's actually tried it since coming to this dumb island, she's still bad at it. but she'll keep trying over and over again for Nino, because even if her chest isn't tight and her eyes don't sting, she still feels something twisting unpleasantly within her at the thought of leaving Nino alone right now]
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[Nino just nods quietly at that, staring down at the ground. It feels like a failure, somehow--she always wanted to make Magilou proud, but in the end...she was the same scared little girl she always was, wasn't she?
Magilou even told her from the beginning to stop Laura from walking all over her.
Maybe she'd still be alive if she could've.
... She breathes out shakily, eye sliding shut.]
I... I wanted to live with Jaffar. We were going to make a home together, and have a family, and... [Now they never will.]
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Where's that spunky spirit of yours, Spunky Mage?
Do you really think this is the end?
[Magilou isn't personally sure what she believes, honestly. but she's heard enough talk about bringing the dead back to life and people from previous games going home that she isn't quite sure this is the complete end of the road]
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[Nino has to admit that quietly, head bowed. It's hard for her to think about, really. The reality is that she's going to die tomorrow, and so is Jaffar, and the promise of a "maybe" is hard for her to think about.
She's not sure how to process that.
But in truth--]
I don't know...if I can do it anymore. [Be cheerful. Smile. Act like everything is okay.] I... it's so horrible here.
But--there is something. That I don't regret at all.
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[Nino isn't Velvet. Magilou wouldn't want her to be. but she doesn't think Nino has to pretend to be okay anymore]
[but there's something else she focuses on first]
Hm? What is it? I think the less regrets you have now, the better.
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This island has been a hellhole. Everything has been one horrible thing after another.
And yet--]
... I don't regret meeting you. Even if this is...how everything ends... I'm really glad that we met, Miss Magilou.
[That will always be certain.]
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[ah]
[such an earnest expression from someone so obnoxiously good should really make her want to hit something. it should really feel like a knife being shoved in her chest, twisted until there's nothing but a bloody hole where her heart used to be]
[and yet]
[. . .]
[there are probably words she could use, here. but words are hard, which is evident by how difficult of a time she had telling Jaffar that she'd be upset if Nino died. so instead of using her words, she uses actions instead-- things she's been picking up from others, from Lucina and Akira, who have both reached out to her with warmth and affection]
[she pats Nino on the head. LIKE A GOOD WINE AUNT]
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A headpat.
Nino's always been the sort of person who, despite appearances, was absolutely starved for physical touch and affection. All she'd ever wanted, in the end, was for her mother to stroke her head just like this, and act like she cared. Even just once. Even for a moment.
It never happened, because her mother had despised her and wanted her dead, but here and now...
Magilou is, and doesn't that mean... Magilou cares?
So Nino's breath hitches, and she closes her eye tightly, and leans into Magilou's touch quietly.]
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[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah]
[THIS IS FINE]
You don't have to be "strong" all the time.
[and. there are the words]
Pain, grief, sadness. They're all a part of living. Just remember, for every drop of grief you feel, there's an ocean of love to counteract it.
[UGH]
Even if you die tomorrow, Nino, you're still living. Right here, right in this moment. And I don't want you to forget that.